We are nowhere and it is now.

And puddles that distort a face

so that sometimes there are many

I'm not sure if i was you

I'd choose me as your wife

The shape of  love has twisted us

And i don't trust myself to look  after

The love you hold for me

Your grin like sunlight,

Crescent moons imprinted in your back

Heart beats soft soft   

Then nothing

Whoever you are 

When you hold me don't disappear

Why  do we stake our claims on the past 

an abstract past, we keep vague

Twenty six years old and still 

I find myself speaking in whirls & illusions

Swollen with habit's so dumbly rehearsed

still living somewhere between the 

lost and the found

a great gaping need

           waiting to be filled.

The Afterlife of Insects

Idea of absence, hard and bright as 

Tiger's Eye in her pocket

She like it under the trees in winter.

Everything overhead, dead or  

Half dead     angle and arc

Heart on a shelf,   lovers in jars

Contemplative, 

lip chant and sing  tongue tied

The nightbirds sleep with wings ajar

This feeling, 

Is ordinary. Self perpetuating, elbow stacked

between earth and sky.

Like tired sisters who've dropped hands

Lover's with matching scars

or someones name    indecipherable now

The silence, of something come

And something gone away

A hand that needles and threads the night away

Above

The sky is a box and a glaze

Moon Vamp

Silence

Soul throated, bird song over water

And afternoon breaking away in pieces

Memories that mix and mis-match 

then settle 

around us like air

Beneath all that

this

afterlife of   i n s e c t s,

We are the lucky ones,

 flat    dream    light   

Myth    

      limb  

the shelved ones

The Night I Realised

Everything stinks 

like an Indian street

The man's 

breath 

who asks me about my country

He says

"How you find my country miss?"

As i exhale 

cigarette smoke 

from my lips

That smells of mixed 

spice chai

 of pigs carcass 

on bitumen 

 pink rubbish piles

in the gutter

Sweet 

perfumed sari's

women's 

eyes 

and

Men's 

urinals

        Basket 

of mandarin 

peel

and 

Boys 

Who shove 

their  Old 

Man's 

hands

in 

tailored 

jacket 

hand-me 

downs

Elastic Plastic Woman

Here comes Elastic Plastic Woman 

With her green plastic skin

And hair of purple straw

She stretches her arm to pull 

A  cardboard cat out from a burning building

And you can hear the crowd, 

All made of wood,

As they are cheering, cheers of gOLD,

"Ho plastic woman, elastic woman,

What a FANTASTIC woman!!

We Love you, and   THANKYOU!"

She winks a green eye,

Sends a purple kiss and with a split to the back

She is gone.

While I,

am left standing alone,

in the corner,

wearing my 'Elastic Plastic Woman'  t'shirt

Fantasizing 

that her kiss, 

was aimed at me

Gideon

Gideon was looking down at her lap

She seemed especially quiet today 

Clutching her broken coffee cup 

Mood silk

only glancing in my direction 

As i leaned forward- more coffee

& she poured in the milk.

I lit two cigarettes and handed one to her

"Gideon,  my dear ...

sometimes, I don't understand what goes on inside that mind of yours"

(Inhale deeply)

"I mean,

Do you ever wonder how it is? How it is you just came to be" 

Pause

How it is you just appeared to me ?"

Glancing at her  over the rim of my coffee cup.  

She looked surprised.

& she looked up.

I take a sip of coffee and inhale deeply.

She rocks back and forth

Gideon dreamy.

Hesitating, 

what next to say 

Her vacant eyes a Coffee Table away.

Gideon looking down, her lap

Fingers entangled delicate as that

I repeat.

"Gideon. have you ever wondered what it is?  How it is you came to be, 

(Pause)

How it is you just appeared to me?"

"No."

She shakes her head and answers to her lap.

I nod and take a sip of coffee,

"Well some other time Gideon, i'll ask you

if you are glad."

Peanut Butter Fetus on my Teacup

There is a 

peanut butter 

fetus

On my 

teacup

On my 

teacup  

that is in the 

sink 

On the side 

of the delicate white

Teacup

That is waiting 

to be washed 

in the sink

Her limp body 

Is blood 

speckled 

From the 

Teaspoon 

I used 

to scoop

Raspberry Jam

A mustard 

blob of still 

birth 

floating 

Fragile

On the side 

of my 

Teacup

It is 2am

And all 

is wonderfully 

still,

As i peer 

down 

into that steel 

sink

Her thumb in mouth

She is curled 

up in rest 

My  eternal 

mustard 

Dreaming 

Fetus

Hovering 

Above the 

teacup,

Eyes wincing 

At her strange 

fragile 

body

Lying 

Still on the bedspread 

of my 

Teacup

And I the nurse 

with my 

blood 

Stained 

dress

Quickly

I wash my 

Teacup

I watch as her body 

slides

Like fluid from

the porcelain 

Still

In the sink

I can hear 

the early morning 

Train

As my Peanut butter 

Fetus

She is washed

Like 

Off 

milk

Down 

the

                       Drain

Tupperware Heart

Tupperware Heart

Closing the scent of you 

Behind with the heavy door

Between us are words

Too many said or not said,

Too  late to dash down and catch mid air embers in your palm

Much easier to swallow than the truth

Time

Is never lonelier  than when  you are in love

I once heard someone say that a heart 

Can live outside the body  for a small number of hours 

Still beating

I remember the staggered look on your face 

As I put my hand inside your chest and

I fiddled around to find it;

Your  Spoiled Rotting Heat 

And I sunk my fist around It 

And pulled It out, held it in my palm 

And then I washed it 

Placed it in a Tupperware container 

And I sealed it tight no air,

I got in my car, your heartbeat 

Beside me, in the passenger seat 

And we drove and drove and drove

Just You and I

Until it got dark

And I had to stop for gas

Somewhere dark and in the country side 

I pulled over to the side of the road,

I wound down my seat

Slept eye to eye, with your heart beat

Suddenly as  if  trying to catch you

I jerk violently awake

Lid in one hand, Dead plastic heart in the other

Curled in a corner of the car

In a shawl a dog bark,

 To the shadows

And after sometime   

The sounds became lighter,

                       and you were no more 

Heart